Alex Posts · Excerpts

Excerpt #7

A Letter To You,

Lately, I’ve been thinking and that is never good. I realized that you were the one keeping me sane. And like the last two guys I dated I was relying on you to keep me happy so when you weren’t there, I got upset. That’s not fair to anyone and it wasn’t fair to me when the other guys did it to me. I was stupid to do that and I feel even more stupid now. I should’ve told you all those times that I wasn’t really okay and let you help me because well look where I am now. I always wanted to be there for you and I still do. That’s not going to change. I still genuinely care about you. And again that’s not going to change. Because no matter what ends up happening, you will still be the person that got me through a hard time and made me realize that I can find a good guy that won’t hurt me the way the others did. And I will always be grateful for that. Somehow, I realized that you kept the darkness at bay, but now I am forced to face the darkness. I know I can’t do it alone and I would never ask you to be there. But even now, after everything, I want to be friends just so that way I still have you in my life. Because for once I’m not upset that you didn’t hold on to your promises because almost no one ever does. I’m upset because I don’t want to lose you, the smiles you brought me, the laughs I had, the feeling I got talking to you, and most importantly the conversations we had.

So yeah, I miss you. I’ll say it. I won’t lie about it. Does it make a difference?

-Alex

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